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Do you find yourself not very productive in your work time, and still tethered to it when you are at home? And somehow it seems that fun, true fun, is nowhere to be found, despite not much productivity happening either? Then it might be that you are unintentionally mixing work and fun to the point where none of them really happens.

Have you ever felt like you do a lot during your day, but like you do not actually achieve much, or that at the end of the day, despite being mentally exhausted, it is hard to even remember what you spent all your day on? Did you ever feel hopeless at the fact that most of your secret wishes, dream projects or ambitious goals never get touched on? I’ve heard some mean advice, that if you want to make sure that your important things get done by people that constantly check their email, you should send them an email about what needs doing early in the morning. They will probably get the thing done for you before they even get started on any of their real work.

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When we forgo the things that we like for too long, and pressure or stress mounts up at work or in relationships, it is much easier to overreact or to feel like our life is somehow being taken away from us by all these other activities. All we need sometimes to feel peaceful and content is a nod towards our own identity, authenticity, and unique pleasures. This requires time for ourselves.

Most of us have heard much exalted talk about the qualities of being present in our own time. And sometimes we confuse being present with being there, for whatever life throws at us, reacting fast to move it or get it out of the way. While fighting makes us feel powerful and invigorated, it doesn’t make us feel like we have more time.

We have heard a lot about deep work lately. But what we don’t hear enough about is how deep work will not result in a good life balance. 

Imagine you have two main projects in your calendar, that you should be working on. In fact, any step in those two projects is bound to make you quite content with yourself, to make you feel that you are making progress, that you are safe and on track, and that you will manage to get it done.

Do you know all those 80 / 20 rules about how 80% of results come from 20% of work? They miss out something essential! 

Many people move their nose in disgust when the subject of breaks is mentioned (I know, because I used to be one of those people). They see themselves as a furnace of continuous activity, which doesn't need any breaks, because, don't you know, they are very energetic. The same people generally can end up taking many secret breaks throughout the day. And by secret breaks what I mean is not that they are hiding their breaks from their co-workers - I mean they are hiding their breaks from themselves.